Domestic Violence Photo
Is there any such thing as domestic violence prevention?
I WASN'T PREPARED. I DIDN'T SEE IT COMING.
A SIMPLE ARGUMENT ABOUT WHO WILL CLEAN THE MESS IN THE KITCHEN...
Domestic violence pictures are never very pretty. You see a mark, a scratch, a bruise, or worse...broken bones...until they go away. But the pain left behind from these attacks are sometimes more deadly than the wounds and injuries themselves.
Unfortunately, my domestic violence story is no different than most. It started with what appeared to be a very sweet, romantic, friendly, and considerate man. It was "too good to be true" that I finally found a man I was attracted to and had so much in common with. Or did I?
I had a blissful first few months, and then the red flags started flying everywhere, but I didn't notice. I didn't WANT to notice. I fell for him and his charm. And he was merely manipulating me because I was so good to him. He said all the right things, every time I would catch him in a lie. He would get a little overly temperamental or insecure about other men and I would have to reassure him.
How cute, I thought, he's jealous. Gosh, he must really care about me. Well, I can tell you now after all these years, it's not cute, and his jealous behavior is due to many years of an unhealthy uprbringing that only HE can get help for and change. If you try to be the mother or support figure he never had, you will become the brunt of all the anger uleashed he kept in for so many years growing up.
Trust me, this is a fact. If you think your male or female partner has their act "so together" because they have a career and make good money, don't be fooled.
Most of all, don't make excuses. Because yes, the bruises hurt, but the aftermath of your life is just beginning.
After more bruises than I can count, knee surgery, and a permanently injured neck with disintegrated discs, ostephytes, and constant grinding in my neck, limited movement and migraines, your physical injuries are only the beginning for years of emotional, traumatic injuries.
Unless you are strong. Unless you fight back. Unless you are smarter than your opponent. Yes, your abuser is your opponent, and you MUST find the smart ways to defend yourself.
Whether it's to start squirreling money away where no one will ever find it, check out pricing for apartments in another town, look for another job and get your resume together, call the schools to find out about transferring your child and what will be needed, do it! And do it now, before you don't have that option anymore.
God gave YOU this life to enjoy the outdoors, meet new people, make friends, raise your children, love your pets, and enjoy your career. This is your chance...and I know you can do it.
I have a beautiful home I bought on my own. I have a great job and it took me 13.5 years to get my college degree. I studied the Internet for over 3 years intensely and have numerous web sites now.
This web site is for you! Now get out there, be smart, be cautious, and make a plan. Go to your local courthouse and find out all of your free options.
Whatever you do, don't file anything until you are long gone and out of the house and your partner has NO IDEA how to find you.
I didn't do that, and that restraining order did nothing but anger my ex so he kicked in my front door in broad daylight, pulled me out of the shower and beat me black and blue.
PLAN. STRATEGY. BE SMARTER THAN YOUR OPPONENT.
PREPARE YOUR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE INVENTORY NOW.
1) Where will you exit from each room if the situation escalates?
2) Get more phones in each and every room of the house (you don't want him to walk so far to answer it -- it's for his convenience)
3) Get pepper spray, mace, or a taser for each room hidden in the house (hide it VERY well!)
4) Keep a spare key for your car, house, and anything else you would need access to if you run away and need someone else to come back later and get them.
5) View your surroundings. Like a fire escape route. Be prepared.
6) Never, ever let your partner know, and don't change your personality too much.
7) If you are worried he's with another woman, DON'T BE! Pray for her and keep planning!
8) Warn your close relatives and friends as SOON as you leave. This will keep them on their guard in case he comes around in a psychotic rant or has a weapon! Warn them RIGHT AFTER you leave!
That "Love" and "Appreciation" you have been waiting for so long to arrive, it isn't coming. And if it does, it's only after they hurt you and put on their best act, and yes, even shed tears, to manipulate you and make you think they feel so "ashamed" they ever laid their hands on you.
But DON'T tell them you know this. BE SMART. PLAN. BE CAREFUL.
LOVE DOESN'T HIT. LOVE DOESN'T HURT. ABUSERS ARE COWARDS.
If you are in immediate danger, PLAN. GET THE PHONE and lock yourself in the smallest closet in the house! Prop your back against the wall and feet against the door...CALL 911 and wait on the line with them until the police are at your door.
If you think he went away from the door, HE DIDN'T. He's waiting.
That bathroom door saved my life that night, but I hope you are never in that situation because you are smarter now than I was.
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One punch to the arm, and an immediate bruise to the bone with broken blood vessels.
IT ONLY HURTS WHEN I MOVE.
Please feel free to leave a comment to let me know if this article helped you, or what other topics you would like to see on the site. I started this site to help others, so I want to make sure you are getting the most from it. God Bless.
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